Decisions!

If I had to do it all over again…what would I have done differently?

Have you ever entertained this thought?

Can you think of specific tasks or decisions that you would have changed?

I read somewhere that the average person will make 773,618 decisions over a lifetime - and will come to regret 143,262 of them. In my case, over 140,000 of them are that if I had to do it again, I would have ordered what someone else ordered at the restaurant. Theirs often looked so much better than mine!

So that leaves 3,262 regrettable decisions. Let me see if I can think of a few off the top of my head:

One of them happened to me a few months back before the virus hit. I was sitting on a plane flying out of Little Rock to fly first to Dallas and then to connect to Denver.

My plan was to meet a client for lunch in the Denver airport and then fly right back home again. (She also had a flight out). So, we had about two hours on the ground to meet. But I had less than an hour in Dallas to make my connection.

If the flight was on time, no problem…but I am pretty sure you can guess what happened next!

While sitting in seat 4A, I noticed a gentleman in 2B ahead of me struggling with his seat. It would not lock in the upright position. Nothing seemed to work for him and finally he called the flight attendant for help. I looked at my phone and saw that although everyone was on board and we were on time, that this was going to delay our departure and thus, arrival time.

I watched as maintenance came on the plane and passengers in both the second row and third row got out of their seats so that maintenance could fix the chair. All that time, my connection time was dwindling from 60 minutes to 45 and to 40 minutes.

Finally, the maintenance man had success and the chair was fixed. The captain explained the situation and said that he would do his best to make up time in the air. They were going to close the cabin door in a few minutes.

Go or no go? I had to decide. If I go and I miss my connection, it means that I will have to cancel the lunch and find a return flight home later in the day to Little Rock.

It means that the entire day would be wasted.

But what if I just get off the plane? I could then cancel/reschedule the lunch and drive home? If I did, I could be home in 20 minutes! I was planning to be in the air and in Denver from 6:30 in the morning till 10pm at night. But if I get off the plane now, I could have a free day!

With nothing on the calendar, it would create so many possibilities!

I could drop by the school and have lunch with my grandson! I could pick up my granddaughter from camp and hangout with her at the playground. I could work out at the gym. I could eat healthy food from my kitchen instead of airport food. Or I could take a nap or maybe go to a movie with Barb at night, etc.

In other words, a free day to enjoy with my family or alone.

Sounds wonderful, huh?

Does this sound familiar to anyone?

Have you been in a similar position in which you must decide between choice A or choice B?

What would you do?

I will share the conclusion of the story with you shortly.

This type of decision is one that as leaders we face all the time but just with different topics.

So often I got tied up and lost time doing the urgent things but not the critical ones.

Or people stole my time during the day with what I call “drama” or “noise”. You know these issues. Usually people get offended by others or there are disputes. Or sometimes an employee climbs into another’s “sandbox” and I would be asked to arbitrate the situation.

Other messy topics like office politics, disgruntled associates or departments in conflict with one another often stole my time as well.

I know feedback is important, but did I really need to do lengthy, check every box formal performance reviews or would more frequent, brief, honest, face-to-face feedback accomplish the same?

How many hours of paperwork did I complete for various corporate departments? How much of it was duplicate? How many hours did I waste in unproductive, disorganized meetings and phone calls?

These matters I call, “noise”. (Things that bubbled to the surface and became urgent but in the end, took away from important topics like building leaders, growing the business, driving efficiencies, improving morale, thinking strategically, executing on our plans, etc.)

I learned I needed to do more of what really matters to the long-term success of the company. I needed to cut through the noise to get to the critical. As one speaker recently said, “I needed to say “no” to the many small things so I could say “yes” to the big things.

I had to decide to focus on the important rather than the urgent.

Maybe this makes sense in your world as well?

Ok, back to my big decision. Stay on the plane, trust the pilot and make my connection in Dallas and thus my luncheon in Denver? Or cut my losses and get off the plane and enjoy the free day at home?

Well, I gathered my belongings and was ready to get off when the flight attendant quickly closed the cabin door and instructed us to take our seats for an immediate takeoff.

The pilot came on the loud-speaker and said we were number one for takeoff.

So, in minutes, we were off to Dallas.

I looked at my phone and I projected I would have 20 minutes in Dallas to go from B4 to C21 once I got off the plane. I was optimistic.

The plane touched down and got to the gate rather quickly! (No long driving tour of the Dallas airport). I was relieved and hopeful.

We pulled up to the B4 gate and panic set in.

Where were the gate marshals? You know those guys that waive the little wands to guide the pilot and the plane? They were not waiting for us! Minutes seemed like hours until they came walking out to the plane at a sloth’s pace.

They got into position, waived us in and the pilot turned the engine off and the fasten seat belt sign as well.

Finally, the doors opened, and I ran as fast as I could. I jumped over small children, hip-checked elderly passengers and completely ran over those that were looking into store windows or trying to get into restrooms.

With sweat rolling down my face, labored breath and tired arms, knees and ankles, I now had gate C21 in sight and I practically sprinted up to the desk. I turned and looked at the door to the ramp and I saw that it was closed.

The gate agent took one look at me and asked, “Mr. Cavallo?”. I replied, “Yes”. And all she could say was, “I am so sorry…you missed it by two minutes. The plane was still there but the door was officially closed.

Missed expectations create resentment.

I was angry. Not at the gate agent, or the pilot, but at myself. I made a bad decision. Every bone in my body was telling me to get off that plane in Little Rock and to have a free day with the people that matter most (the critical not the urgent). But I didn’t listen. I didn’t follow my instincts and I let someone else (the airline) steal my time. Bad decision.

One of 143,262 in my life.

I encourage you to listen to your instincts or gut, to follow your intuition, to put the critical ahead of the urgent and to keep what matters most in the front.

My suspicion is if I have done this more in my lifetime, I could have made even better decisions, been more productive, built stronger leaders, had better results, lived healthier and had more time with my family and friends.

In other words, do what matters most, first!

Back to Dallas airport. I did make lemonade out of lemons that day.

Being frustrated, tired and angry, I was no longer thinking about eating healthy. I looked at the Dunkin Donuts not far away where I was standing and I saw a big, chocolate donut staring right back at me. For only $17.00 and 3,000 calories (a little exaggeration) we chose each other.

I just said to myself in my best New Jersey accent; “Fahgettaboudit ” and I savored each and every bite of that donut.

Finally, I made a good decision that day.

Thanks for reading this.

With a goal to “help the next one in line”, Glen Cavallo, a 30+ year healthcare executive has chosen to share the many lessons he has learned with others. Glen does this by serving as a coach/advisor to leaders at all levels of organizations, as a board member and as he presents inspirational speeches at regional, national, annual and awards meetings.