Finding Joy

Finding Joy

From time to time, our little, three -year old granddaughter, Abby, sleeps overnight. She sleeps in a little kiddie-sized bed at the foot of our bed. I usually go into the bedroom after Nana has given her a bath and they have read some (many) books. My job is to tell a never-ending story about a little mouse named Mousy and his mouse family. It centers on the adventures of Mousy going on picnics, to school, to the lake and the like. This story started about five years ago with her older brother and continues today. Most recently, at the end of the story, I tucked Abby in and kissed her on her forehead and told her that I loved her. Abby whispered, “I love you too, Pop Pop”.

My heart leapt for joy. No five words could have meant more to me. As I write this now, I can still feel that incredible warmth, peace and love of Abby’s words.

Since retiring from my day job over three years ago, I have had many more chances to find joy. I now find joy when opening my office window and looking at the blue skies with puffy white clouds. I find joy in the smell of the freshly mowed grass. I find joy watching our little Norfolk terrier jump up and down when we pick him up from the vet. I find great joy coaching and helping others on a regular basis. In fact, it feels like I am finding joy everywhere now. I have learned the importance of joy as the years progressed.

I cannot look back on my childhood and say that it was full of joy. My parents were incredible. They were loving, supportive and hard-working. But Dad worked as a truck driver and worked long hours and was often tired when he got home. Mom was the ultimate homemaker and worked hard to take care of all of us. We seldom played board games, went to the movies etc. Life was challenging. Sometimes I wonder if the enemy stole our family’s joy by creating fear and uncertainty. Unpaid bills, a house that constantly needed work, a car that was often down with no money to repair it. Healthcare issues, death of family members, and the like. The list goes on and on.

Or maybe our joy was stolen just by plain day-to-day work.

Early in my career as an executive, I fell into the same pattern of fear. I lost sleep over declining sales, lawsuits, regulation changes, earnings shortfalls and about a hundred other topics. I swore that people could take one look at me and determine if admissions and census were good or bad. My joy was stolen again.

In 1997, I accepted a position in Fort Smith with a large publicly traded company. It was my first opportunity to be a CEO of a company. Until my family could join me, I commuted weekly about 7 hours from Tennessee to Arkansas each Sunday night and Friday. I drove 493 miles one way, along I-40 for a number of months.

One Sunday afternoon, while driving back to Ft Smith, I came to the top of a hill and saw these beautiful incredible mountains in front of me. The scene just exploded. The sun was shining just right-so much so that the mountains seemed to light up the sky. I gasped at their beauty and the wonder of God. Almost instantly, my soul jumped too. It was as if a light switch had been turned on. I felt more alive than I had just minutes prior.

I remember saying to myself that I wanted to start over. New job, new people, new friends all awaited me in Ft Smith. Why not eliminate the things that stole my joy and replace them with things or people that brought joy? Why not be surrounded with employees who were positive, uplifting, energetic and supportive?

From that moment on, I tried to ‘choose’ joy.

I cannot say I was perfect in always being joyful. My wife and children will tell you I failed often. But I can tell you I was better! I saw things in a different light. I handed stressful situations better and tried to stop filling in the void of information with the negative. I heard a quote that I try to live by: “Today, you can either practice stress or practice peace”.

And in business, I took the approach that “I never lose. I either win or I learn.”

All of this started with me. I chose to be more joyful. I chose to hire and retain staff who wanted to help others succeed as much as succeed themselves. I surrounded myself with positive people who were loving in their personal lives as I assumed it would carry over into the workplace. And I stopped more to admire the mountains, lakes, oceans or just wildlife. I found so much joy in playing with my grandkids or sitting and reading a book on the beach. Oh, I have to admit that I cried tears of joy when the Phillies won the World Series in 2008 and when my grandson and I sang “Fly Eagles Fly” when the Eagles won their first Super Bowl a few years back.

If you are a leader and building a team as some of my ‘coachees’ are currently, I strongly encourage you look for people that have joy in their heart and soul. This joy will be contagious, and staff will ‘jump on board’ as well. The culture of your workplace will shine. Your team will then come together to do great things at work and in the community. And all of this will bring great joy to your soul.

Thanks for reading this.

With a goal to “help the next one in line”, Glen Cavallo, a 30+ year healthcare executive has chosen to share the many lessons he has learned with others. Glen does this by serving as a coach/advisor to leaders at all levels of organizations, as a board member and as he presents inspirational speeches at regional, national, annual and awards meetings.